Even though coffee is verboten for this blogger, I decided after the sleepless night I had I was going to go crazy and brew a pot. Just call me irresponsible and unreliable too.
~~Sorry for getting a little sidetracked but I couldn’t stop singing the above song after I wrote that last sentence~~
Anyway, the reason for my lack of 40 winks? MOOSE! Specifically Mildred Moose, at least that’s what I call her. We haven’t been formally introduced but she just looks like a Mildred to me.
Mildred is really cramping my style. Every morning when I’m walking Jasmine around the ‘hood, and we’re just hitting our stride, I spot Mildred…lurking. The scary part is that I don’t notice her until I hear her snorting and chomping on some poor defenseless foliage just yards away. I’m not an outdoor kind of gal so these encounters, while thrilling, are also terrifying and just way too close for comfort.
The first time I saw her I tried to snap a picture with my antiquated cell phone. I only managed to shoot a picture of the tree that Mildred was hiding behind. Maybe this was because I was panicking a bit when she raised that Jimmy Durante snoz in the air and took a big sniff. Maybe I’ve seen too many scary movies featuring beasties (Jurassic Park came to mind) , but this seemed like a really good time to turn around and head back from whence we came!
But last night I decided maybe I was making a mountain out of a moose hill and decided to google “Moose attacks in Anchorage”. BIG MISTAKE!
~This is akin to googling “headache” and becoming convinced you have a brain tumor and have only weeks to live~
I came away with numerous hits, both old and new, about attacks in suburban areas of Anchorage. It seems with the record snows we’ve had this year the moose are irritable and a little cranky from having to climb huge snow banks and search for food.
Then I found out they don’t like dogs, they can run as fast as a rabbit, and they can kick sideways too! This does not seem to bode well for Jasmine and I, since she’s a dog and I’m as slow as molasses. A double whammy if Mildred ever decides we are interrupting her all you can eat buffet!
As Einstein said, “a little knowledge is a dangerous thing”!
But the new day found me pulling on my boots (because of course it’s snowing here yet again), leashing the dog and venturing out onto the mean streets of Anchorage, filled with more moose knowledge than is good for any one person to possess.
As I peered around every corner and tree on our journey, Mildred was no where to be seen. Even though I was relieved to make it home unscathed, a part of me missed the little vixen.
- Petting a moose puts military spouse in bad light with agency, on Facebook (stripes.com)
- 85-year-old wife saves hubby from moose (nation.com.pk)